Many holidays carry with them a lot of expectations: visions of a family in total peace and relaxation, times of total financial and emotional abundance, and a curated season of gift-giving or celebration. While holidays can provide us with opportunities to reach out to those we care about or break up monotony, they can sometimes also dig into emotional wounds or remind us of our insecurities. With such high expectations, it can be hard not to feel disappointed or to feel as though your life doesn’t live up to the image that you see. On Thanksgiving these expectations extend not only to what we do, but to how we feel. Being told to feel gratitude can feel like an imposition and become harder to reach the more you are told to grasp for it. This Thanksgiving, I hope that you can feel empowered in your choices, rather than beset by the pressure. Instead of trying to match your reality and headspace to external expectations, what would it look like to have curiosity around our own emotions? Does it bring more flexibility to your headspace when you allow yourself to say no to the expectations around feeling a certain way, including gratitude? If instead of reacting, what does it look like to cultivate a sense of wonder in your own time? You have within you the power to choose. Rejection of expectations, whether it is about how you’ll celebrate a holiday or what mindset you’re holding, is a key part of a healing and resilient community. Sometimes that can look like taking the opportunity to reflect on thankfulness, to practice gratitude exercises, or to make space for wonder about our humanity and our world. Sometimes it looks like saying no to holiday expectations, including what we are supposed to feel. When we allow ourselves to embrace what is rather than what we feel it “should” be, we can find greater rest and joy in the holiday. On Friday, we will be holding a Thanksgiving Art Event in our space in the Jewish Community Center. If you would like to spend time connecting without expectations, we hope you’ll join us for relaxing snacks, art-making, and warm conversation. |